The vernacular term “delusional” received a facelift last year. As is customary with crop tops, Gen Z-ers sliced it into a shorter, cheekier version of itself: being “delulu,” unlike its predecessor, isn’t necessarily a bad thing, multiple newspapers excitedly explained. It might simply entail believing in oneself despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. According to the Delulu Doctrine, if you hang on and desire something hard enough, it may simply happen.
While “delulu” is a delightful neologism, if you’ll allow me a quick solluluquy, as a life philosophy, I’ve often found it lacking. Related concepts include manifesting and faking it until you make it. This contradicts my belief that the most effective route forward is to be realistic and do the job. (I don’t always do the job, but I believe in the concept of doing it.) Take the TikTok inventor, who told HuffPost a few months ago that being delulu was the trick to growing his hundreds of thousands of followers: Even though his early videos had little views, he believed in himself, and the numbers soon grew. That does not sound like delusions to me; it sounds like hard work and perseverance. Though I concede it’s a lot less enjoyable to say.
Taylor Swift, on the other hand, completely undermines my dedication to practicality. (The wrench is embellished with Swarovski gems). The last year of Taylor Swift’s life has effectively served as a permission slip to be absolutely delulu. Her courtship with football player Travis Kelce has unfolded like a rom-com-meets-inspirational sports documentary from the start, culminating this past weekend with Kelce and Swift kissing on the field after his team won the Super Bowl.
So much of adulthood, particularly for women, is about resetting expectations and retraining your brain to reject what Hollywood misled you into believing love and passion should look like. You convince yourself that there is no such thing as love at first sight and that individuals sprinting through airports to profess their love are a screenwriter’s creation. But what should a sensible mind do when presented with photographs and videos of Swift and Kelce hugging after the big game?
Swift’s reputation has always been that of someone who has battled with love. (She is aware of this, which is why she has named her future album The Tortured Poets Department.)
When she was a youngster, she sang about white horses and marriage proposals, but she grew up, and her more recent work reflects that she is now in her 30s and debating whether she really wants to be someone’s wife. Though we don’t know what their relationship is like on the inside, pop culture analysts and fans often see Kelce as a person who is worthy of her—who really values her. For her to have this fairy-tale, Americana relationship when she used to write about fairy tales and Americana is difficult to accept, especially for someone who is trying to avoid rom-com-inflected fantasies.
Is the message for us average folks that only letting go of your biggest ambitions will make them come true? What about the “love will find you when you least expect it” song and dance? Of course, it’s possible that we shouldn’t be seeking for life lessons in the narrative of a millionaire who, despite her penchant for playing the underdog, was always going to come out on top. My delulu differs significantly from hers.
Is the message for us average folks that only letting go of your biggest ambitions will make them come true? What about the “love will find you when you least expect it” song and dance? Of course, it’s possible that we shouldn’t be seeking for life lessons in the narrative of a millionaire who, despite her penchant for playing the underdog, was always going to come out on top. My delulu differs significantly from hers.
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